Sir, I read with interest the letter from Ms Dewshi1 in which she relates an incident where a male patient asked her if she is strong enough to remove his tooth. I similarly noted the letter next to it, which referred to the new female BAOMS Council members and reflected on the great progress women have made in dentistry.2

Firstly, I would like to supportively observe to Ms Dewshi that in my nearly 40 years of dental experience, a smallish (albeit memorable) proportion of patients can say very questionable things as they sit down in one's chair. These comments can range from the crassly inappropriate to the jaw-droppingly aggressive and all shades between.

The dental chair can be a very difficult place to sit for very many people and as a result they can sometimes thoughtlessly and inadvertently show the worst of themselves while they are sitting there; totally scared stiff/not looking forward to paying a large bill/cross because the receptionist has been rude/needing the loo etc. It could be that the macho man who offended Ms Dewshi was simply scared stiff of undergoing an extraction and just too 'male' to admit it. I put that forward as a possible explanation not an excuse.

What would I have done in her position? After some thought, I would have booked him a free short review appointment a week later to check healing and get his feedback on the procedure. Then I would explain why I had found his comment inappropriate, asked him his view and then asked him if he wanted to say anything to give me the confidence to retain him as my patient. No doubt the GDC would have a view on that approach.

Secondly, I would also like to add my observation (garnished with my fervent hope) that more female influence in UK OMFS departments will help dilute the noticeable amounts of toxic arrogance and high clinical self-regard present in too many of these male-dominated arenas. Maybe the high levels of clinical acumen backed up with empathy, sympathy and (dare I say it?) some kindness, brought in by more women will improve the care in OMFS departments up and down the country?