Sir, I write regarding one of the biggest scourges to the country's teeth, indeed to our nation as a whole, in recent years: one 'Great British Bake Off'. I feel it is time for the judges of this sugar-filled show, namely Mary 'not very good for teeth' Berry and Paul 'flirting with decay' Hollywood, to be held to account. We all think it's a bit of fun, a bit of light relief but no, I think it's more serious than that. It's a disgrace and I, for one, want to put a stop to it. I know the BBC have already put a stop to it for different reasons but I wish everyone would just stop baking.

Forget about soggy bottoms, it's decaying teeth that concern me. Every time Paul Hollywood shakes a simpering contestant's hand to congratulate them on another cake or rather 'tooth death trap' well made, he might as well shake plaque's hand instead and lay out the welcome mat for sugar in the nation's collective mouths. The signature bake presents a signature danger to teeth, the technical challenge a challenge to all oral health and what they term the famous 'showstopper' is frankly just a 'sugardropper'.

I know some people will say that cakes and biscuits are okay as a treat now and again, especially if eaten with meals, and these people will maintain that limits not bans are the most effective and realistic way to approach our sugar addiction, but I think they should be outlawed. I say make the nation go cold turkey on fun... I mean cake.

With this in mind, I propose that Paul Hollywood and Mary Berry be stripped of their titles as the King and Queen of Bakers respectively. Calling them so is an affront to our Royal Family. They are cake-peddling hacks stripping joy from the people and replacing it with adipose and decay.

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1. Rantshire