Sir, I write to you regarding the significant increase of dental trauma over the Christmas period. Our emergency dental clinic is pushed to the limit at this time and patterns of causes have begun to emerge.

1. Yuletide stress leading to tooth wear

Last year a patient presented with a cracked molar caused by excessive grinding of her teeth. She explained that the arrival of her in-laws and their insistence on listening to Cliff Richard's 'Mistletoe and Wine' on repeat was just the beginning of a tricky Christmas. The stress was exacerbated by burning the turkey, running out of brandy and having to sit through the Queen's speech. The patient noted that she heard the tooth crack during a particularly frustrating (and tedious) game of Trivial Pursuit

2. Misuse of toys

I am frequently perplexed by children's insistence on biting toys and/or placing them in their mouths. A few years ago I had the unfortunate pleasure of removing a Lego figure's head from a tooth. It looked like a novelty crown

3. TV arguments

Two years ago a patient had reportedly lost a tooth during a heated debate over the quality of that year's John Lewis advert. I assured the patient that she was correct, Monty the Penguin is annoying and The Beatles' version of Real Love is far superior.

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